In primary school I used to be a Girl Scout and the Scout motto was,  “Be prepared”. This meant that a scout must prepare herself by thinking out and practising how to act in any accident or emergency so that she is never taken by surprise. We had to be equipped with survival skills and the activity that I enjoyed the most was camping. In the forest we were taught how to pitch a tent, make a fire, and to navigate our way back to the camping site or to safety using signs. Not only was it fun, it also helped build character and resilience. 

No one wants bad news

Crisis moments do happen. The question is, are we ever prepared for them and if so, how adequately? We will never know when, in what form and intensity a crisis might hit us. Events like sudden death, a car accident or even a house burning down do take us by surprise. There are of course incidents that we will have anticipated or seen coming like death as a result of terminal illness. The resultant pain is just as intense. It is human nature not to want to experience pain and the suffering that comes with it. When something terrible happens to us, we are forced to dig deep into our inner being to find the strength, and the tools to help us deal with what is on the outside.

A survival kit is a  package of basic tools and supplies put together in preparation for survival in an emergency or crisis. None of us can ever go through this life without experiencing some serious crisis situations. A crisis, like the tempest has the potential to break us into pieces, sink us and leave us stranded. In such cases we need to be in possession of some basic tools of survival.

I have had my share of crisis situations and looking back, I survived them somehow. If I knew then what I know now, I would not have allowed myself to act like a victim. I became angry at the world and at myself. I despaired, sank into depression and felt helpless. Life did not stop because I was stuck no, the world lived on! It then hit me that it was no other person’ s responsibility but mine to rescue me. I had to learn to swim and here are the survival tools I collected along the way.

• Prayer

In this life, to get ahead or get something you need connections. However, I realised that there is a greater presence out there which is much more powerful that any one of us or our connections. It is a greatness I could directly connect with and whose power I could confidently tap into without the help of another person. That greatness is God.

Prayer became the direct line I used to talk to God anytime and anywhere. As I did my walking exercises I took time to feel and see His presence in every thing. He is the life in the trees, the birds, the dogs, the rain, the people I meet, and in me. When I used that walking time to pray I was hit by the realisation that I had a lot of things to be grateful for. My prayers began to shift from begging and bargaining to gratitude and praise for starters. I also shifted mentally, from being a victim to taking charge. That was an empowering and peace inducing experience.  

• Meditation

With meditation I am more aware of myself, the surroundings and walking allows me that. The more I become aware the more I get to engage my five senses. I get to hear the dog barking on the other side of the fence and the chirping of birds in the trees nearby. I also get to observe the seasonal flowering of the trees and splash of colour. I have been fortunate enough to walk into beautiful sunsets and to be cooled by the drizzling rain. When I go uphill I get to feel the pain in my legs and the pumping of blood in my heart, and be grateful that I am alive. I never had time for all these things back then. I could see and yet I could not see. You become aware of the fact that even simple things hold special meaning in our lives. Just taking time to STOP and smelling the roses!

• Exercise

I never thought a day would come when I would describe exercising as a powerful survival tool. Before that exercising was something that I really dreaded because of the work and pain involved. Now, 7 years later and still going exercising has become a lifestyle. The benefits that come with exercising are amazing. It has enabled me to travel light when it comes to emotional, physical and spiritual baggage.

When I suddenly lost my job some 7 years ago, I felt my world had come to a crashing end. Things went out of control financially and emotionally. I became depressed and hypertensive and started walking in order to cope with stress. The more walked the better and lighter I felt. I lost the unhealthy and toxic emotions, the baggage that was weighing me down.  I even lost weight and became fitter.

• Water

Research has shown that up to 60% of the adult human body is water. That is enough to tell me that I have to stay hydrated else I dry up like biltong! Some of the health benefits that come with regular drinking of water include aiding in digestion, helping kidneys flush out toxins, carrying oxygen to cells and preventing headaches. Water is something that can not be easily enjoyed unless it is accompanied by some sweetness. They say you have to acquire a taste for it!

I never used to enjoy drinking water. I used to suffer from terrible stress induced headaches and there was always a bottle of painkillers within reach. I could even pop them in anticipation of a headache. No one wants to be labelled an addict because you always think you are in control. When my son warned me about my addiction to painkillers, I had to learn to drink water instead. The more water I drank the more the headaches receded. Now they are few and far between. Water please!

• Laughter

Cliché as it sounds, laughter is the best medicine. I totally agree. Laughter is good for our overall health.There is a feel good factor that comes with laughter. That is why they say we should not to take life too seriously because no one is coming out of it alive.

A sense of humour is a survival tool we also need during difficult times. Not to take away the gravity of difficult a situation nor trivialise it, laughter helps us rise to a level where we realise such is part and parcel of life. It starts with the ability to laugh at ourselves before can we laugh at others and with others. Good laughter that which is not aimed at disparaging ourselves nor the next person. Laughter is also a disarming weapon. If people are laughing together, they are generally not killing each other.

• Love

Love and makes us realise that we are not alone. When going through difficult times, we tend to withdraw from our social circles, retreat into isolation and sink deeper into depression. The love and support from those who care about us is just the lifeline we need.  We should be open to receiving love and help. When I look back at my experiences, it is the support and love, (sometimes tough love) from family and friends that kept me going.  

To be able to receive love and to love back, we have to learn to love ourselves enough and not act like victims. The idea of self care during a difficult time is not act of selfishness. It is a way of arming yourself  in order survive the storm.  Self love and care involves accepting that you are not superhuman but vulnerable to the whims of life. Coming up with healthy ways of coping is an act of self love and bravery.  The essentials in my survival kit are all elements of self love.

• Learn

It starts with being open minded enough to know life is a continuous lesson. Instead of feeling sorry for ourselves and becoming bitter, we need reframe by gleaning the lessons coming out of unpleasant experiences. If we consider life as  black and white, we are bound to limit our learning experiences. Life is multi-coloured and full of possibilities. Had I solely focused on the unfairness of life, I would never have been here  writing this article and on my own blog-site. I learnt that at 50 years of age, I am still young enough to learn more, try new things and even start life on a new slate. I also opened myself to learning from other people. Learning is a life long exercise, you can never say you know enough.